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Best Chat Up Lines.

 Extracts from The Lazy Sod's Guide to Sex << Click for more information

Best Chat-Up Lines

First impressions count. The first few words you say to a girl can; intrigue her, excite her, make her laugh or make her vomit at your cheesy chat. Fortunately we have done all the difficult ground work to find the best lines for both men and women. Try a few and see how often you score.

 

Best Chat-Up Lines for Men

 

Success Rate

I’m David Beckham. (If you are David Beckham)

100%

42 . . 6 . . 13 . . 27 . . 4 . . 7 Wow! I’ve won the lottery!!!

99%

Let’s get my chauffer to drive us to my yacht so we can set sail for ecstasy.

98%

This is a Colt 45 and it’s loaded – so get your kit off. 

97%

Fancy a vodka and ketamine?

92%

I’m 89 and a millionaire. will you marry me and nurse me through my risky heart bypass operation?

84%

I’m David Beckham. (If you are not David Beckham)

1%

 

Best Chat-Up Lines for Women

 

Success Rate

Hi.

100%

I’m pissed.

100%

Take off all my clothes.

100%

You look like someone I can trust.

100%

Je pense que je vais être malade.

100%

My last boyfriend died of syphilis.

100%

I’m a virgin / slut / whore / nudist / stripper / guy in drag.

100%

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